Wives and Their Words

 Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruit. Prov 18:21 

If you’re a wife may I ask you a question? How do you talk to and about your husband?

I’ve been watching a growing trend between wives and their husbands, and it’s alarming. The feminist movement, the media and the sin nature have made great progress in redefining the roles in the home. We see husbands in the nightly sit coms portrayed as irresponsible and inept. Wives will make fun and diminish them in front of the children and everybody laughs it off.

Unfortunately many wives in the church have taken their queues from society.

I’ve recently completed a thirty- day challenge with a handful of other Christian women. The challenge was to speak only words of encouragement and praise to our husbands for thirty days. What a raw and humbling reality. I needed the Holy Spirit to keep me in check as never before. As I went through this challenge day after day, I wondered why in the world I wasn’t more the cheerleader my husband needs me to be.

Wives, will we consider the power of our words when speaking to and about our husband’s. Do we realize that our words of encouragement can be like a drink of water to a parched plant in our husband’s life?

How often do our husbands hear the very words of praise they crave from us come from another woman? Let’s take heed wives, this is our ministry to them not another woman.

As wives we should seek to be proactive in the practice of kindness and encouragement to our mate.

How? We can start by prayer. We need to ask the Lord to uproot the weeds of constant negativity toward our husbands. Let’s pray that by the power of the Holy Spirit our tongues will be transformed into instruments that uplift and not tear down, that help instead of harm.

The thirty- day challenge has ended but what a spring- board for me to keep going. “Lord, please keep transforming my tongue and let me use it to bring help, hope and honor in my husbands ears.”

 Here’s a quick checklist to see how we’re doing in this area:

• Are you a chronic complainer?
• How often do you say, “You can do it! I believe in you! You’re the best!”
• How often do you notice his effort to make the yard look nice or to keep the cars running smoothly?
• When was the last time you said, “You handled that situation so well”?
• Do you acknowledge when he’s going through a difficult time and let him know you’re there for him?
• Is your home a place your husband enjoys returning to every night?
• Do you look for opportunities to compliment him on his wisdom?

It’s so much better to put the wind in your husband’s sails than put in a rip that deflates them.

Suggested reading-

The Excellent Wife by Martha Peace

Feminine Appeal by Carolyn Mahaney